Thursday, March 7, 2013

Beauty Tip: Learn to Love

 'Sup Horse mouth!? I would like to take advantage of these pixels to proclaim that this is not a lure for compliments or pats on the back. I wanted to talk about this, because I know nearly every person will be able to relate. It was only about 3 years ago I began to feel comfortable smiling in photographs. My smile had been the main source of self-consciousness in terms of my face for 26 years. Because, well....it's HUGE. The problem is, when I was younger it got huge before anything else on my face or body had the chance to catch up. With buck teeth and huge gums I was the prettiest belle at the ball (belles = kids, ball = playground me = being sarcastic. I was not the prettiest.)Yes, yes the teasing ensued, as I'm sure you too experienced in elementary, middle and/or high school.

What? What's that you say? You weren't teased in school? Oh, well...how pleasant that must've been! And if Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion taught us anything it's that you will NOT be flying away in a helicopter with Alan Cumming, so you can suck on that!

Anyhow, about 3 years ago I saw a photograph of myself, caught in the midst of happiness and just decided I was over feeling that way. With the plethora of digital photos taken now a days, it seemed like a waste of energy to put effort into trying to figure out an expression to make other than a smile whenever a phone propped itself in front of my face.

It's a fucking smile. It represents happiness! So what if the barn yard animal I most closely resemble is of the equestrian variety!? Horses are graceful, noble beasts, dammit! (Also I realized not smiling in social situations can make one look like he/she has "pretentious ass/bitch face").

With all that said I have allowed my smile to become one of my most favorite physical attributes. No more covering it up with my hand when I laugh! My shit is large and in charge. It's all about perspective.  Take your pasty skin for example. It's actually fair skin, and some might go so far as to say it's porcelain-like. Bug eyes? Nope! Disney Princess eyes...you get the idea. Also, bushy eyebrows are fraking dramatic in a good way, so stop obsessing. (Uni-brows? Well you can pluck or not pluck, but Frida Kahlo made that werrrrrk. She did not come here to give a F, and she is one of the most gorgeous women of all time. OF ALL TIME).

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and when it comes to your own beauty (if my mom taught me anything) you just happen to be the most important beholder, ya heard?!

Any qualities you've learned to love about yourself?
{Jacket: Stolen from my little brother}{Silk Shirt: Thrifted}{Skirt: Thrifted (similar)}
{Watches, Necklace, Rings: Vintage or Thrifted}{Belt: Thrifted (similar)}{Boots: Born (similar)}

37 comments:

  1. I needed this.... I actually used to really like my smile until I had my son and started drinking so much coffee that it took a toll on my teeth....now I hate smiling bc I get jealous of those with pearly whites.....but maybe I'll get over it.....i had a freaking baby so what my teeth aren't perfect!!!
    Brooke @ what2wear

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  2. You look fantastic in these photos. And thanks for sharing the story. I think you're right everyone has been teased about their looks at some point. We all just need to be comfortable with who we are and how we look.

    Heidi’s Wanderings

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  3. Amazing pictures and look! :D
    You look stunning.

    xx MJ
    http://shopaholic-thoughts.blogspot.pt/

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  4. Gaahh! I am so happy you wrote this!! I couldn't agree more! Like Audrey Hepburn said "happiest girls are the prettiest girls"... And that starts with us being happy with ourselves... Those ghosts of middle school can be very haunting, but I find that living in the truth of who we are makes those voices disappear and take a lesson from Simba... it's important to "remember who you are".... FYI... It's still hard for me to smile in my photo's too! Your beautiful! p.s sorry this comment is a book..
    Hope
    hchdesigns.blogspot.com

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  5. seriously stunning dear! great post thanks for sharing
    http://unzippedfashion.blogspot.com

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  6. Stunning pics.... beautiful look! :) Belt looks so amazing...
    www.styleofdarina.blogspot.com

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  7. So this is totally off-topic and irrelevant to your post {which is lovely, by the way. And you've a beautiful smile, although you did ask not to give compliments... Sorry I'm not sorry!} But I saw your comment on another blog and instantly knew we had to be friends. So hi Ashley, my name is Oksana. I'd love to keep in touch. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to peruse the rest of your posts. XOXO

    www.foxyoxiesupernova.blogspot.com

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  8. ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS post! I agree with everything in your post!My thing was my forehead in middle school....I thought (and was told) it resembled a conehead. Now I laugh at myself, and how silly it sounds to be a conehead (yes, please laugh out loud when you read this!) and give thanks for my large forehead....because I can wear any hairstyle and it still looks great. BO-YA!

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  9. Amazing photos :) I cannot begin to tell you how amazing that jacket is! I love it! And you look gorgeous ofcourse :)


    Also, would you mind voting for me on American Eagle's site. Takes 2 secs lol: https://live.ae.com/#/entries/3272

    I'd really appreciate it! Please and Thank You!

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  10. That skirt is such an amazing color and it looks fantastic on you!

    And you are so right! I had braces really late in life, got them as a senior in high school and just got them off a couple of months ago. People would be all like, "why would you want to smile?" And I just thought, "because soon my smile is going to look hella lot better than yours!" Okay, maybe I just thought that but still, no matter what may be "different" if you got it, you should rock it!

    xoxo,
    Laura
    http://lauraisthriftingthroughlife.blogspot.com/

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  11. Laura!
    Good for you! I went through the same thing when I had braces. Who would ever say, "why would you want to smile"??? Love the 'tude you got goin.."If you got it, you should rock it"...that made me smile!
    xo
    ashley

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  12. I love this post - I think you have a beautiful smile! My biggest issue is probably my nose - it's really, really flat (thanks Asian genes) but my husband thinks it's cute and I've grown to kind of think so too :)

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  13. Thanks for the inspirational words :) I think you have a beautiful smile! I think my confidence in my smile is definitely something I have to work on. Your words were truly encouraging :)

    That jacket you borrowed from your brother is too cool! I love the beat up look, really gives it character. If these photos were taken in your backyard (or a backyard? It looks like a backyard... I think.)-- it is one seriously cool looking place. Also, I loved your interview with Pardon my Fashion :) You're just filled with words of wisdom!

    Mili from call me, Maeby

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  14. Totally agree with your words. Thank you so much for sharing!
    You look stunning too. This outfit is so pretty on you!
    xo,
    nancy

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  15. I feel weird sometimes when smiling, but I'm agree with you. Thanks for reminding me this :)

    The jacket is absolutely amazing! What a perfect look!

    xxx
    - Laura
    http://ucouldbemysomeone.blogspot.com

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  16. I understand what you mean completely. I wore braces on my teeth for 1 year and smiling was a big issue :D After a few months I got fed up and started making the most cheesiest smiles, don't give a damn anymore.
    I think you look extremely beautiful and have a very unique style. And totally stalking you ^_^

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  17. My thoughts exactly... well put! glad you are not covering it up no more & is rightly more confident in your own skin. :) Smiles are just lovely and so is yours!!!

    the grass is always greener too, what features we may not like on ourselves others actually prefer.

    Tasty jacket + belt too.

    ▲_▲ HYENA

    xx

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  18. I have to say, this post couldn't have come at a better time! I can completely relate, as I just started to dabble in self-portraiture and if theres one thing I've learned in the process it is to embrace my flaws. After all that is what makes us unique right- ROCK that smile!!


    //Birdie Shoots//

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  19. Your lil bro has good style if you got this jacket off him! How awesome! And you are stunning in these photos - this seriously looks like you walked out of an Anthropologie catalogue, I love ittt!

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  20. Hi, dear, really nice blog and great photos!!!
    Maybe we can follow each other !?
    And I invite you to a new giveaway in my blog!
    Shabana Khan giveaway – Win stunning earrings

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  21. My buck teeth are slowyl creeping back not that I have stopped weariny my retainer (seriously? Those things are nasty, especially after 10 years of wearing them...) and I recently chipped the corner off one of them but I am just rocking it. Who cares anyways, right?
    Leah
    www.e-plus-l.blogspot.com

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  22. Oh my god.
    Oh my god.

    You were SO SO SO right!
    We ARE in cosmic alignment.

    I have so much I want to say here that I feel like I'm exploding.
    LEt's start with the shallow;
    Who the hell took these photos and what the hell did they take them with??
    This literally looks like an editorial out of vogue (and I haven't been 'lured into complimenting', this is genuine drool-worthy fawning going on here)

    Second: YES YES YES.
    This post makes me feel so damn good. I love hearing that you've just said screw everyone else and gone with what makes living easiest. Obviously you're drop dead gorgeous, so it's so funny for me to see someone who I honestly would kill to look like, say that she has insecurities too. It's sad that we all have doubts about our beauty, but it's sort of encouraging too.

    Thanks for posting this, and for being so honest and cool and funny [[(belles = kids, ball = playground me = being sarcastic.]]]= my favorite quote on a blog...ever.

    I 'm so obsessed with you and your blog I can't even deal.

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  23. This is a really wonderful post, and so true. We all have insecurities, but it's so important to be able to come to that place where we can just accept ourselves and see beauty everywhere, even in what some might consider our "flaws". :)

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  24. B E L L I S S I M A !!!!!!
    Love,
    C

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  25. You have the most gorgeous smile and it's absolutely fantastic that you've grown to love and accept this feature about yourself! Such an inspiring and uplifting post...maybe I'll even attempt a smile in some of my photos sometime...

    http://www.monadot.net

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  26. You are gorgeous, I love your smile!

    Maria xxx

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  27. Well, it helps that you're naturally stunning and have perfectly shaped lips! I know where you're coming from, though. To put it simply, I need major dental work. I'm scared and have no dental coverage, so I've been putting it off. Needless to say, I'm a bit self-conscious of my smile, like many people are. The other day though, I realized that my smile isn't all that bad, despite its imperfections. It's nice to read about someone else who's struggled with the same insecurities.

    P.S.
    This outfit and the photos are so gorgeous! Pinned a couple shots :)
    Fleur d'Elise

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  28. WOW. Spoken from the heart. I really want everyone to read this post! And it's one I want to save and reread regularly as a reminder to embrace everything I am, "flaws" and all. Not that I think you have ANY flaws - you have such a beautiful, unique look! Thank you for writing this, it's my favorite kind of post to read. And I love the R&M reference - I could quote that movie all day haha.

    Have a fantastic week!

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  29. i can totally relate. well, i guess everyone can totally relate because we all have some weird feature that we want to angle into submission in photos, and those who don't are either not real or past caring (luckies).

    hiding unique features won't do anything productive, while learning to embrace them will make you a more mature and confident person.

    big smile,
    lindsey

    fraululu.blogspot.com

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  30. Girl I am soooo glad you got over that! I was scrolling through your posts and I stopped at this one because of that beautiful smile! We all have things we don't like about ourselves and if we think really hard it's because someone at sometime told us they didn't like it. Embrace and be happy with what we have! Your absolutely beautiful!
    www.ahkavintage.com

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  31. This post has made me dig up issues I always had with my nose, and to say I still don't like a full-on shot from my side. It's just too long and big. But somehow I've embraced it too over the years and while before people said: you're gorgeous and I didn't believe them, now I can smile back and say thank you.
    We are all unique and maybe it's the feature that we dislike the most that can grab others attention and what they actually love about us. Because to be honest, I love your smile and you really look so beautiful in those pictures! You just radiate that confidence your talking about and for anybody looking, that's what's important.
    Maya
    archistas.com

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  32. This is very enlightening and fun read. First time saw your blog. ;) Your message has definitely went across and it's taken. So thumbs up! Thanks for this and keep smiling, coz you do have a lovely smile ;)
    -Auie
    www.purevowels.com

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  33. This is such a great message! I've had braces and glasses at the same time and I was always self conscious but its such a good feeling to love yourself and proud of who you are. And your smile is beautiful!

    www.findmefab.blogspot.com

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  34. Good for you :) Your photos are beautiful and smiling is always a good thing, brings good energy in. We all have something about our bodies that bother us somehow, but it's good to learn to embrace it (god knows i go through this battle everyday haha).
    xo
    http://polkadottedpearl.com

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  35. YOU'VE GOT SOME BALLS OF STEEL WOMAN...AND it's hilarious! This is just SO amazing girl. LOVE YOU for this. EVERYONE has something...it truly is best to just suck it up and say, "This is me, BITCHES." I am alwayssss breaking out and getting zits...but like you said, one day I was just like, "Dude, it's such a waste of energy to dwell on such trivial little things." And I gotta be honest, I always just thought you had an insanely righteous smile, because unlike some smiles yours look completely comfortable in it's skin :)

    xoxo
    www.PardonMyFashion.com

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