The significance of our trip to Catalina Island this past weekend is something that took me a minute to figure out. I was so absorbingly happy from the moment I set foot on the island. For obvious reasons of course (clear water, friends, sunshine, booze, more importantly: breakfast sandwiches, etc...), but there was something felt in me that was more significant than "happy" or "relaxed". Maybe it was that I would never do anything like decide to hop on a ferry and take a weekend trip to an island and sleep on a sail boat under the stars in Texas. And not just because there's not an ocean in Texas, but because I never really did anything spontaneous back home.
Or maybe it was because I've struggled with anxiety (the levels of which have ebb and flowed) since I was 17, and went into this situation knowing I would not be in control. I would be on an island. I would be on someone else's sail boat rocking in the ocean. (What if the I get sea sick..how embarrassing?! What if I feel trapped in the middle of the night and can't get away?!? What if I have to poop?!?!?) Perhaps this seems stupid, but sometimes I even have issues riding in other people's vehicles because some fucked up part of my brain is so terrified at the fact that I am not in anyway in control.
Me on therapists couch: Regardless of all this, doc, I did great, thanks... pass me the tissues.
Not to mention how reassuring it was to be with several people who have open-heartedly accepted me and Jonathan as family. To have positive, working, giving, hilarious, creative adults we can call friends out here is such an incredible blessing. And to be with this group in one of the most beautiful places I've ever visited just reminded me of how thankful we should be.
In the blink of an eye our lives changed, and all we did was work hard and pray.
You know what? Maybe I just had too much time to lay on the beach and think about it all, but either way this was a special trip.
An initiation into our new life.
The exciting stuff is listed below in no particular order
-Ferry rides are fuuuuun, and there's 2 bars on the one that goes from San Pedro to 2 Harbors.
-Natalie Wood drowned at 2 harbors, so there's your spooky Hollywood history
-We saw seals and Jonny saw an octopus while snorkeling
-I snorkeled. (huh?)
-There was a counter you could walk up to and order delicious breakfast sandwiches.
-We slept underneath more stars than I have ever seen.
-We ate Frito Pie.
-We paddle borded.
-We napped on the beach.
-We woke up early in the sun and drank coffee on the boat.
(This was my favorite part of the trip. The light was so beautiful.)